Have You Got Trust Issues?
Remember last week's newsletter about how sharing meals can boost social connection and happiness? Today, I'm excited to share another fascinating finding from the 2025 World Happiness Report: the powerful impact of trust on our well-being.
Trust expert Rachel Botsman (author of How to Trust and Be Trusted) explains that our level of trust can affect our happiness in unexpected ways. While headlines often claim trust is in "free fall," Rachel thinks the reality is more nuanced and offers valuable lessons for improving our lives.
You can hear my full conversation with Rachel on The Happiness Lab "Have You Got Trust Issues?," where we explore two common trust problems: being too trusting and not trusting enough. This week's guide focuses on practical ways to build more trust in your everyday life:
6 Ways to Build Trust in Your Life
Take "Trust Leaps." Get out of your comfort zone by stepping from the known into the unknown. While we often think of trust leaps as major life changes, they can be as simple as speaking up in a meeting or trying a new activity. Start with small leaps to build confidence for bigger ones.
Practice the "Trust Pause." Before automatically giving out or withholding trust, take a moment to slow down and ask: Does this person, information, or situation deserve my trust? The pause serves as an empowering reminder that trust is a choice—one that puts you back in control of your decisions. You don't have to extend trust to everyone or everything you encounter online.
Explore Your Trust Barriers. Trust barriers are our beliefs or fears that prevent us from taking healthy risks. These obstacles can be paralyzing — for instance, believing you'll never be able to achieve financial security or maintain a long-term relationship. We can question these barriers by asking: Where did this barrier come from? Was it something I developed or was it something I was told as a child? How much is based on facts versus fears? Simply understanding the source of our hesitations can help us move past them.
Lower the Leap, Not the Ambition. We can sometimes get ahead of ourselves by making grand leaps to overcome our trust barriers. Instead, we should shoot for smaller steps to make sustainable progress in trusting a bit more without overwhelming ourselves.
Get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. There's value in having difficult conversations, particularly around polarizing topics. Instead of avoiding these discussions, recognize that healthy disagreement rarely damages close relationships and can lead to greater understanding and happiness in the relationship. Remember that modeling this behavior teaches children the invaluable skill of engaging with different viewpoints while maintaining respectful relationships.
Focus on Local Trust. Instead of fixating on large-scale trust issues you can't personally solve, redirect your energy toward building trust in your immediate community. More specifically, focus on addressing an issue in your own neighborhood. Strengthening connections with neighbors and local groups gives you meaningful social ties and a greater sense of agency.
By understanding how trust operates in our lives and taking small steps to build healthier trust, we can counter the trends of declining trust in the World Happiness Report and create stronger connections with those around us. Each small act we take to build trust at the local level can strengthen the social fabric that supports our collective happiness.